You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
