One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize