Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
