im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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