you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
