Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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