I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
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I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
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I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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