Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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