hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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