I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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