Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
