I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize