YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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