I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
