In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
