what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
