Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
