As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
