I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
