Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
