I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
