Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
