sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It was a blind-side dick pic.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
