like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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