weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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