It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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