Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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