I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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