They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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