I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Randomize
