i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
