If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
