I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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