i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I have already put on my inside pants.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
