you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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