i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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