Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
