i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize