I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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