so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
