NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Come see our sink grown plant.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
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he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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