So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
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There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
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it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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