I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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