I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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