FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
