Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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