respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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