Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I just want to make out with him forever
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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