Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize