My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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