Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
